America's Dumbest Criminals - Season 4, Episode 13 - Mannequin Mystery - Full Episode | Forensic Files

-Tonight on "America's Dumbest Criminals", is it possible to do the right thing by making a wrong turn?
Is there something just a little too life-like about this department store mannequin?
And could this be a sign of trouble for a sneaky criminal? For the answers to these and other cliffhangers,
stay very still for the next 30 minutes and feel superior to America's Dumbest Criminals.
[music playing] Now, welcome your hosts, for ADC, Daniel Butler and Debbie Allen.
[applause] -We are so glad to have you along. We've got some incredible stories to tell you.
-We do. We do. And one of them involves a suspect who poses as a mannequin to avoid capture.
Now that sounds easy enough, right? -Well, we've invited little Alex Gilreath from our studio
audience to give us her best impression of a mannequin. Come on up, Alex. Hi, sweetie.
-Right there. All right. You can pretend to be a mannequin? Are you ready? OK. Pose.
Oh wait, I forgot to ask you, how old are you? -Six. -Ah. Mannequins don't talk.
-Aw, Daniel, you are not playing fair. -And you can't-- you can't laugh, even when somebody gets right up in your face and goes,
illlll-- like that. -He's being mean, isn't he? -Yeah. I should have been a police investigator.
How fast I can make them crack, huh, under pressure. -Oh yeah, just as long as all the suspects are six years old.
So friend, during Daniel's mannequin shenanigans, I'm going to give you an ADC t-shirt.
Look at this. It's big enough for you and your two brothers to fit in. [applause]
-Yeah, it's a nice shirt. Watch your step. There you go. -Aw, she's a doll. -And for those of you at home, we've got our first story.
It's about a man who learns that you only have one chance to make a first impression.
Here's Caught on Camera. [music playing] -Some time ago, I was on patrol. And we noticed a car that was going north on our major road,
and it only had one head light and no tail lamps at all. So with put on our video camera and turned around
to make what was a routine traffic stop. We asked him for his driver's license. And this subject gave us a name and date of birth.
And from that, we've got a driver's license number. We felt we probably had the correct name.
And so we released this subject after writing him a citation. We later found out that the ticket went to warrant.
And a card was sent to the name that he had given us. And it turned out to be this guy's relatives.
After identifying the subject, a warrant was obtained for forgery of a government document.
After several months, the same officer and myself driving again are on the same stretch of road about the same time.
And the same guy comes by with the same car, with the same head light and tail lights again.
And he gets out and give us the same fictitious name. And which completely different results.
-I thought you looked familiar. -You don't remember me, do you? Well, I sure remember you.
Instead of being stopped for just a traffic offense, this subject committed a felony by signing a traffic ticket
with the fictitious name, which is forgery. [applause] -Our next story also involves a man who has an identity crisis.
-Well, actually, he just loses it. Well, sort of. Fortunately for the good folks of the police force in Tinton
Falls, New York, they were able to restore order and order the guy behind the bars.
-He leaves us with Something To Remember Me By. [music playing] -Several years ago, I went to a call
about a residential burglary. And going inside, looking for prints and evidence,
found in the second drawer, which was subsequently closed by the suspect, I found a McDonald's name tag inside.
So I questioned the homeowner. Didn't know anybody that worked at McDonald's. So therefore, I put it aside.
I collected it as evidence. And several days later, after calling the fleet of McDonald's
in my local area and nobody knew about the first or last name of that name tag that I found.
So probably about three days later, one of my traffic officers made a motor vehicle stop.
The subject had no license on him. Of course, he does a license check by name. And the name was the same name I had on the ID tag.
So I went over there. And upon questioning the person, he denied that he ever worked at McDonald's
or a fast food restaurant. -Actually, I'm between jobs at the moment. -Consensual search.
In his vehicle in the trunk was his McDonald's uniform, minus his name tag. He didn't go to work for a couple days,
because he was on the run doing these burglaries. He never realized that his name tag was missing.
So at that point, he was placed under arrest, brought in. And because of that piece of evidence,
didn't serve us any more fries for the rest of the week. He was fried. [laughter]
-You know, I wonder if he shared a cell with the Hamburglar. -Stop. You're making me hungry.
I'm sure he did. You've heard the phrase, any port in a storm. Well, when police came storming up behind a suspect,
he definitely shouldn't have dropped anchor where he did. -Ho, boy. Yeah, you can say that.
A surveillance camera shows that he picked a hideout that's known for harboring criminals.
See what we mean. -There's a running joke in the department about the guy that actually ran right to us.
I was working third shift. I noticed three vehicles which were southbound through the town.
The middle vehicle tail lights were completely out. It didn't have any tail lights or any brake lights.
The closer I got to the vehicle, there was a Pontiac Grand Am white in color that was in the rear.
He continued to try to block it. At this point, I knew there was something wrong with the Jeep.
They didn't want me to get near the Jeep. So I backed off. I activated my overhead lights.
The Pontiac did exactly what I thought it would do. He pulled over to allow the other ones to continue.
As soon as I got him pulled over, i whipped around him and then went after the Jeep.
As soon as the Jeep realized that I was coming after him, he began to run. The car was stolen, or they'd been
out burglarizing something. There was something in that car that they didn't want me to get.
They went through that stop sign back here, and then they went in through the Water Department here.
He went through the car wash, and I knew that there was only two ways out there.
And as hard as he was going, he went right through one of the stalls. He realized he didn't have anywhere to go
and he hit that partition. I came in shortly after he hit that and tried to get them
on tape as they were bailing out of the car. As he bailed and ran across the street,
Sergeant Conlan got behind him. And he got a little worried, didn't know where he was at
and just wanted to dive into some doors. And come around the corner, and then went right into our lobby of the Police Department.
The officer inside said he ran in, started to say something, looked to his right.
And at that time, we had all of our photos on the wall. And then he just kind of dropped slumped down to his knees.
And we were pretty shocked when dispatch came over and let us know that he had run through our double doors
and right under the Police light. While we were taking the guys to jail, the two were in the back , the passenger was back there,
telling him he couldn't believe he'd ran through the front doors of the Police Department, that big red and white sign
that said Police right over top of his head when he went through. And they were laughing.
It was pretty funny. [laughter] -In Utah, you can marry your cousin after you reach the age of 50.
-Our next story is about members of a family. It's about alleged dismemberment. And it's about a guy who can't remember
to keep his story straight. Guaranteed to be more goofy than gory, it's a member of the elite set of fabrications
we call America's Dumbest Excuses. [music playing] -Being a burglary detective, I investigate
different burglaries. I had a residential burglary to a lady's house, where I had some prints of the suspect.
I asked the suspect to come down, and he did. And the first question I asked him, would you lie to me?
He said, no man, I never lie. I said, well, tell me something. Did you break into a lady's house?
No. I said, well, how would your prints be in her house? Well, by somebody must have used my hand.
I asked him, have your fingers ever been disattached from your hand? He said, no.
I says, have your hand ever been disattached from your body? He said, no. Well, so your fingers and your hand and your arm
are all attached to your body. And in 30 years, they've never been disattached. No.
Well, how do you explain your prints being there? And he said, my cousin just used my prints just last week.
-A coat hanger is a modern miracle. I mean, you can use one to unlock a car door or hook
something just beyond your reach. You can even use one to hang your coat. But we've never seen anything like the precision bumbling
exhibited by this reject from the Mission Impossible forces. He's earned a starring role in tonight's Blue Light Special.
[music playing] -About a year ago or so, I received a call of a theft that had occurred at a local gas station.
The store owner was kind of upset, he said, but he had everything on surveillance tape.
So he popped in the tape. And immediately, I knew who it was. -At the very beginning, he was kind of casing the place out.
He had already had his coat hanger sitting by the window. So you can see him reaching down to pick it up,
when the coast was clear. The only way he could get into it was through the slot
at the base of the window, where the money's exchanged when people come in to buy gasoline.
And then he started going fishing, try and reach in and grab cigarettes, lottery tickets, things like that.
-Suddenly, he realized that there was a camera about six inches in front of his face.
He was unsuccessful in getting the items he was after. But on the first attempt, he was able to take the coat hanger
and yank the camera down. -But it was too late. We had already caught him on film.
-Everyone watched it, and they found it hilarious immediately. So later that day, we looked, naturally, for Donnie,
because he's usually not that hard to find. However, we didn't find him. Later on that evening, after getting home from work,
there was some noise going on outside. So as I got up to check, to my surprise, there's the guy who was on the tape, totally unplanned.
It's not like he was hanging out. He just happened to walk by. I ran. I grabbed my gear, grabbed my handcuffs.
And I went out, went outside and then I arrested him at that point. The expression on his face was sort of like, oh [expletive].
That's pretty much it. [applause] -Oh, my I think is what he said. OK, here's the mannequin story we alluded to earlier.
It involves a suspect desperate to elude police by posing as a department store dummy.
But this crook is a living, breathing example of why it's not wise to run from the law.
-The break-in is at a boutique. This store is located on Queen Street. And when they walk in, there's the mannequins
with their wigs and all that on. The officers searched the building and don't find anybody.
And the officers inside find the extreme urge to use the restroom. So they proceed to use the restroom.
When the store owner gets there, the owner comes in, they start showing him around.
And the owner looks over in the corner. He says, well, who is that? And one of our officers says, well, that's a mannequin.
And they pull their guns, and the arrest the guy for breaking and entering. He's a cross dresser.
He was dressed in his wig. He looks purty when he's dressed up. They bring him to the station.
He's interviewed by one of our investigators. And he tells our investigator, he says,
I'm saw them using the bathroom. I just didn't want to disturb them. [applause] -And now, for the guy who scrapes up the crumbs
from the CNN banquet table. Here's Danny, with the ADC headlines. [applause] -Thank you, I think.
A man wanted to ride shot gun with the Akron Police. But his plans went awry. He requested permission to participate in the Department's
ride along program, but was unaware of the mandatory policy of conducting background checks.
Oops. The man was not, shall we say, on good terms with the law, due to previous problems.
So instead of riding in the front seat, officers requested he ride in the back. And wear handcuffs.
Go figure. A man charged with drug possession told a judge that he had been illegally searched.
The officer countered that there was a bulge in the defendant's jacket that could have been a gun, which gave him
the right to check the garment. Indignant, the defendant handed it over to his honor
for inspection. You guessed it, the judge found a packet of cocaine in the pocket.
He was found guilty of stupidity in the first degree. Most people don't suffer consequences
for calling a wrong number. But most people aren't this nurse in Massachusetts. He mistakenly paged an undercover state
trooper, who returned the call. The nurse then asked the officer if he would like to buy more morphine.
OK, the quick thinking trooper set up a buy and Mr. Morphine discovered that stealing and selling drugs
can become a real pain. And that closes the file on ADC headlines, news ripped from somewhere near the back
of your local newspaper. Debbie? [applause] -Ralph Waldo Emerson said that if a man makes a better
mousetrap that the world would beat a path to his door. Well, our next story involves some of those elements.
There's a door that leads to a art who gets trapped. It's tonight's Special Delivery.
[music playing] -Last October, I was just getting finished talking with some silent witness people in reference to a tip.
I left their business, pulled up to a stop light, look over to the side and see this guy
sitting on the traffic control box. I was wondering what he was up to. He jumps off this traffic control box,
runs over to my car and grabs the back handle to my car. I think, this isn't too good.
I thought he was going to try and car jack me and steal my car. Just about that time, I opened the front door,
as his hand's coming around to the front door of my car. And I meet him with my service weapon.
What are you doing to my car? -What, I'm not doing anything. -You're trying to get into my car.
You were just trying to get into my car. -I'm not doing anything. -Go ahead and turn around.
At that point, took him into custody. I'll give you a ride in the car. Come on. And found some methamphetamine and some drug paraphernalia.
Nobody touches my car. [applause] -OK. Because of the delicate subject matter of the next story,
I'll use game show titles to describe what you're about to see. There's a guy who's looking for a love connection.
He was playing a dating game of sorts, but when he said, let's make a deal and agreed the price is right, he found himself in jeopardy.
Whether he's hormonally driven or just showed no concentration, you'll have to agree that the joker's wild.
Let's see what lovely parting gifts we have for our next contestant. -Working in a prostitution sting,
I was a prostitute and looking for johns, basically, on the street corner. And there's a gentleman drive by in a white car.
And he'd driven by me several times and came around the block. And we can't ask them what they want.
They have to tell us what they want, what kind of services they want me to render to him.
So he proceeded to tell me what he wanted. And I said, meet me down the corner. Go around the corner right over there and I'm be right there.
I'll be there in a second. And that's where our other undercover people take him down.
-Hey, baby, after all this is over, you still want to go out for a drink? -Keep moving.
-Oh, no, I mean a real date. -Even after her was arrest for prostitution, he still was trying to hit on me,
at least for a date afterward. [applause] -In Richmond, Virginia, it's illegal to flip a coin
in a restaurant to determine who pays for a coffee. -I was working security in one of our district courts.
Part of the procedures for everyone entering in a court is all their belongings have to be searched
and have to pass through a metal detector. A female came into the court and was asked to empty all of the belonging in her purse.
We started taking out all of her belongings, she produced two bags of marijuana.
When it was called to her attention, she was placed under arrest, she had claimed
that she had found the items in the parking lot of the convenience store and didn't know what they were,
and decided to pick them up and put them in her purse. Upon further searching her, we found two more bags
of marijuana, some illegal prescription medicine, and two burnt marijuana cigarettes.
She was then arrested and brought to the station for booking procedures. It just goes to show you what drugs will do to you.
This is your brain. [applause] -Trying to fit a square peg into a round hole is a bad plan.
But we learned of a high caliber plan with a huge potential to backfire. -Now again, here's the story of a rocket scientist
who will definitely not win a Nobel Prize for physics. Everybody better duck, we're loaded and locked
for this week's report of We're Not Making This Up. [music playing] -I was working in an area that's part
Washoe County and part Reno. And I get flagged down by this guy. And he looked kind of like a transient.
His hand is wrapped up in a towel. He's obviously bleeding. So I stop, and he doesn't speak English.
So I ask him what happened. And takes the towel off and his hand's really mangled up.
And he takes his fingers and does like this. And I asked him if he had been shot.
And he kind of shook his head that he had. Later on, I find out through an interpreter he had burglarized
some homes and had taken this pistol and a handful of ammo. And he went back to his little transient camp
and he had nine millimeter bullets and a 38 pistol. So he decided to put them in anyway.
And he put them in and then began hammering them, holding the gun in his hand, was hammering the two bullets in with his knife.
And they went off and shot himself in the hand. [bang!] And he was pretty messed up.
He'd just been living up there and burglarizing houses. He told them that he was going to take this pistol
and start doing some robberies so he could make some real money. But instead, he just got to go home.
[applause] -Looks like we'd better take this opportunity to go out with a bang. -But never fear, we haven't run out
of strange stories of the morally challenged. So we'll be back next week. -In the meantime, you can always visit our website for more
state-of-the-art stupidity, at www.dumbcrimes.com. -And if you've got a story to pass along,
you can send us an email through the website. Or write us at this address, America's Dumbest Criminals,
3201 Dickerson Pike, Nashville, Tennessee 37207. -And thanks to the wonderful officers who helped us tonight.
They're representative of the kind of good people who keep us safe from the bad guys.
-And thanks to you for joining us. -As always, we hope that we've all learned from others' mistakes.
-But if you haven't, we just might see you next week, on "America's Dumbest Criminals".
-Good-bye.

In this episode of “America’s Dumbest Criminals,” we’ll witness whether it’s possible to do the right thing by making the wrong turn, a life-like store mannequin and a sign of trouble for a sneaky criminal.

Crime is no laughing matter, except when the criminals are bumbling fools. Hosted by Debbie Alan and Daniel Butler, this show looks at lawbreakers through a humorous lens.

Brief Summary

Criminals make foolish mistakes, including a suspect posing as a mannequin and a burglar caught by his name tag.

Key points

Caught on Camera. A man learns the hard way that lying to police can lead to serious consequences.
A Case of Mistaken Identity. A burglary suspect tries to explain his fingerprints found at the crime scene.
Mannequin Shenanigans. A suspect poses as a mannequin to avoid capture, leading to a humorous arrest.

Episode highlights

Episode quotes

Is it possible to do the right thing by making a wrong turn?

0:08WatchMar 10, 2022

Tension

40/ 100Low tension

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