Paris catacombs, haunted accordions and more with Josh Homme | Morbid | Podcast | Forensic Files

Hey weirdos, I'm Ash. I'm Elena. And I'm Dr. Joshua. I love that. I did not expect that. This
is morbid. [Music] With Dr. It's different from Dr. Phil, you know, very different.
Just barely. We're both not doctor. So, he's going to be joining us in a second. Dr. Joshua.
Dr. Joshua. We have Josh Hami today on the show. Uh Josh is a musician, singer, songwriter,
multi-instrumentalist, and frontman of a little band called Queens of the Stone Age. We are so
[ __ ] excited to have Josh on today. This is gonna be so much fun. It really is. Uh, and he's got something
pretty cool that he just did. On Friday the 13th of June, he released Queens of the Stone Age: Alive in the Catacombs,
which is this like super intimate, totally unplugged performance that's in the actual Paris Catacombs.
They are the first band to legally perform in the Paris Catacombs. Absolutely insane.
It's w and it's incredible. It's beautiful the way they did it. It's super like they really like honored the
space for sure. Like in a big way. It's got gorgeous cinematography. It's such like haunting performances and it's just
kind of him like walking around singing and they have like this like the string instruments and the like it's very calm
and like just really beautiful. There's also a behind the scenes uh little dock too which is really cool.
Yeah. And it's really interesting. And they do it in like a black and white thing which like just gives it like a
warmer like I don't know. It feels right. I know. It's weird because it's black and white and then you're like it's
warmer but it is it makes sense. Something about it is like super cozy and like just like ooh
I think it's the catacombs. Yeah, I think it might be. But we'll include a link in our show notes uh to
order both the performances as well as that behind thescenes uh look at it. Um it's I'm telling you it's so worth it.
Yeah, you got to check it out. And before we talk to Josh, before we get him on here, we wanted to give you guys
a quick, very quick look at the Paris Catacombs. I we are going to revisit the Paris Catacombs in a different episode
where we're going to do like a true deep dive into it. Um, not literally. I was going to say that's pun intended,
I guess. But right now, we will be the second band allowed to perform there legally.
Legally. I wanted to give you just like a quick look at it just so you when we're talking about it, you know a
little bit behind the scenes here. So the Paris Catacombs, it's a network of tunnels 80 ft below the streets of
Paris. It's filled with the remains of around 6 million people. Six million, which is three times the population of
Paris alone, which is just my brain can't comprehend that. I can't even picture like 48 people,
never mind six [ __ ] million. Yeah. And there's like two there's more than 200 miles of tunnels under here.
And only there's only a portion of them that are mapped out. I think it's like maybe up to 200 miles that is officially
mapped out, but there's tons more that isn't. It's It's wild. And there's only like a mile of it that's really legally
available to the public. You you know, you get a ticket, they take you down with a guide. We recommend that that's
how you do it. It's the safe way to do the safest way to do it. Of course, there's, you know, illegal ways to get
in all over the city, but that can be very, very dangerous. And we never encourage you to break the
law. Yeah. And we don't encourage you to do something that's going to like hurt you
or someone else. We like you too much. We do. We love you. So, there there's also this really funny like name. It's
not funny, but it's just like cute. No, it kind of is. It's like a fun cute name. Yeah.
It's cataphiles are what they're called. And it's people who are really dedicated
to exploring the catacombs and they've done like a lot to map out these hidden places. Like they're very dedicated to
it and they know everything about it. They've found, you know, hidden little like swimming pools which like you don't
want to swim in stagnant water. Uh the they found ritualistic setups down there. That is scary.
The way that you went from like swimming pools to ritualistic setups. That's upsetting. There's hidden
tunnels. strange drawings like art down there. I mean, it's a wild world down in
the catacombs. It's bonkers. And you might be like, "Whoa, that sounds really cool." Like,
awesome. Uh, where did they come from? Like, why are they there? Why does that exist?
We'll tell you. Well, I'm going to tell you cuz it originates in the 12th century. So, a
little bit ago. Long long long longgo. Long long time ago. So, they were excavating quaries like
lime mines essentially below Paris. They were like taking out the limestone to be
used in, you know, building the city's defenses, all that kind of stuff. And they were like, "Wow, this is really
working out great." But what they forgot was like when they built stuff on top of
these now hollowed out quaries, it wasn't going to go too well. Yeah. The structural integrity was just
not there anymore. So there was a lot of cave-ins during the 18th century that left entire streets of Paris just
plummeting into the depths below. A problem, if you will. Big problem. So, in 1777,
a little a little guy named King Louis V 16th, I think I've heard of him. Yeah. He was like, "How can we make this
not awful? How can we make it so people don't plummet to their depths?" Yeah. So, he hired an architect and he
had he was like, "How can let's turn these into like galleries, like something that you want to see,
something you want to visit. Like, let's capitalize on this essentially." Which makes me want to learn more about
who the [ __ ] he was. Like I know top of the ice, the tip of the iceberg about Louis, but I'm like
about old Louis though. About you know Louis. Yeah. But the fact that that was his go-to and he
was like you you know what we could do? We could make a gallery of bones down there. Well, he initially he wasn't
making a gallery of bones. Initially he was like, you know, let's make this. It's almost um it's not the same, but
it's almost like akin to like a king's um Mary King's clothes where it's like a city underneath a city almost, but
it's like he wanted it to look like what was above it almost like kind of thing like make it a gallery of Paris like
that kind of thing. Oh, and somebody took that to a different place cuz at the same time what was happening
was graveyards were overflowing with human remains. And when I say overflowing, they were overflowing.
So overcrowded that people nearby these graveyards were getting sick off of the [ __ ] gases that were coming out of
the decomposing bodies in the ground. Ew. Because they were so overcrowded that it
was escaping. Ew. And these gases were so [ __ ] noxious, and we'll get into this when we
cover them. Yeah, we're going so [ __ ] bad that it it could spoil milk and rot meat within hours.
E. So, people were like getting these gases coming up through their basement and
[ __ ] like it was bad. I bet it was actually green. Oh, I that's how I picture it. I picture
green gas emitting out of these like cartoonish green gas. Yeah. And so there was a cave-in at the
Holy Innocence Cemetery and I mean that one was wild. They were stacking bodies on top of each other for a long time.
There was like thousands of bodies in there. I mean, it was gnarly. Damn. Um, and so this was a problem when this
caved in. Everybody was like, "Yeah, this is not great." They were a little outraged.
Yeah. They were sick of their their meat and their milk spoiling. So Louie was like, "We'll just have the
dead moved into the galleries that were built in these abandoned quaries, obviously. What else are we going to
do?" Again, I want to know more about him. I also want to know that. Uh and so in
1785 they transferred these bodies into the catacombs. They had like processions
of you know black clothed uh you know carriages. There were priests and holy people chanting prayers as it was going
on. That's rad. It must have been the gnarliest procession to watch like an Yeah. Like
just knowing that they're just putting these It's like going to a metal concert but like a little bit different like
slightly different you know. Uh and Yeah. And so they dedicated a person like an an artist essentially to
arrange the bones in an artful way. And when you look at them now, you can see like they're beautifully arranged. They
look like they are part of the structure of the place. They look like they are art themselves. Like
they've been meticulously arranged down there. Yeah, Gary and Larry [ __ ] it up
down there. And don't you worry, you'll hear about Gary and Larry in this episode. Don't you worry. And I mean
[ __ ] it up in the good way. They did. They [ __ ] it up. [ __ ] it up. There's entire
Because because you have to understand there's [ __ ] it up. Yeah. Or there's [ __ ] it up. [ __ ] it up.
Exactly. There's like entire pillars that are made of bone. I mean it's it's truly if
you watch Alive in the Catacombs, the Queens of the Stone Age thing, you'll see these in some in a really
beautiful way too because they it showcases it in a really nice way. Mhm. In fact, they like really The one thing
you have to know about this is that they like truly honored the space with this performance.
They did. And there was one point actually in the in the behind the scenes thing where I
think they were t like somebody, you know, one of the producers or something was talking about putting candles around
or fake candles and Josh actually says he doesn't want candles cuz he's like that feels like weirdly ritualistic and
like kind of offensive. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like I like that. That's the mindset they went into. They were like
that's not what we're doing here. Like we're that's not the goal here. We're not trying to make this spooky.
Like that's not the And they didn't they didn't make it spooky. They made it like beautiful.
Well, and they just they really just worked with the space that that was already.
They literally honored it. So, it's very I highly recommend it. But each collection down there has a marker
saying which cemetery or you know grave place you know mass grave basically that
it came these bodies came from. Um and in 1809 it opened to the public and people were initially allowed to
just [ __ ] roam free and then they said that's probably a [ __ ] idea. After they lost a few people they were like
huh we should probably put a lid on this. So, you know, cuz there was also damages being done. Like, it is really
sad. You go down there and there's so much graffiti. People going to people. Yeah. People going to people. And some
like weird [ __ ] [ __ ] was happening. People were getting lost, all that stuff. So, the government restricted
access and now you have to get a ticket. You have to go down with a tour guide. And it's only to a certain point.
The governmented always. They all governments always be governmented. While people people government's
government, it's true. They always do be. Uh, but that's like your little just a little
taste of the catacombs where at least where they come from, what they're about and what you're going to see down there.
And now we can bring Josh in and um you can have a blast with us. Let's go. Let's go. Well, welcome to the
show. Thank you for hanging out with us today. Oh, thank you for having me. I'm really
excited. Yeah. So are we. This is huge. We're so excited. We have Josh Hammy on the show. I don't know if
you know him. He's from this little band. you know, every once in a while pops up Queens of the Stone Age. I'm
sure our listeners are are looking it up right now. But at the top of the show, we talked a
lot about like the catacombs themselves. We talked about the history of the Paris
catacombs. I shouldn't say the catacombs because there's more catacombs in the world,
which is wild. I know. They have There's some under Boston, in fact. I know. We got to go.
We do. Wow. Really? I know. They're smaller, but you're close. It's just two people.
That's it. It pro it literally is I think it's like 21 people or so. Yeah. It's nothing in comparison.
You walk in Boston like here you go. Here you go. Like you saw it. Get up. All right. Next. Who's it?
I'm ready. Let's go. Uh but we we did mention uh your newest really really cool, really unique performance, Alive
in the Catacombs. Um we talked about it. We watched it. It was phenomenal. So, I
couldn't get over like it was beautiful. It really was. Honestly, I knew it was going to be
beautiful, but I wasn't expecting it to be as moving as it was. Oh, thank you. I appreciate that.
That space is so beautiful and uh as sort of existentially beautiful, too. Oh, yeah.
It's not just, you know, it's not just how it looks, it's how it feels. and what you you immediately understand what
it took to make it. Yeah, absolutely. There's something really beautiful in the effort it took to make this, you
know, the catacombs. Oh, yeah. And probably so overwhelming, too, in that moment. Oh, for sure.
Yeah. I mean, you you you immediately I think it's different because we didn't take a tour. I don't know. The only time
I've ever been there was when we played there. Um that's shocking. What a first time.
Yeah. I I I'd been working on this for so many years that I swore off going there until I had the first date.
Oh, that's so cool. I love I love that. You know, I thought I'm not going to go.
I won't go. There's nothing like that feeling. Go away, you know. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, that space is so
dominating that you immediately start asking yourselves questions like because these I saw 28 years later last
night. Oh, I haven't seen that yet. I'm dying though. So there's this one moment where
all these there's a you know a momento mory section in this movie and Ralph finds his character asked most the same
questions that I asked when I was in there. It's like you're looking at these skulls and you're like these eyes have
all seen, you know, these have all smelled. These these these mouths have all you know spoken words of of love and
of you know passion and anger and and and acceptance and it was just like so overwhelming you know
that and you look at these these bones and you think this is me. I am this, you know, this is you.
It's it's it really was overwhelming. Existential, I think, is definitely the perfect word for that.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It al honestly, it's because I I was thinking about that while we were
watching it because when you see them all like first of all, how many there are and then the way they're so artfully
arranged. I I worked in a morg for a long time. Like I I was an autopsy technician for like 5 years. So I I
there was many times where I would look down and just be like, "Wow, like this is a person. This is a whole person."
Like the and it was the same kind of thing where like we like, you know, we always closed eyes or like put something
over their eyes because it just felt like you don't want them watching you while you're doing everything.
And every time I know you're like, "Don't look at me. Don't look at me. Don't look at me."
Yeah. And but it's the same kind of thing where you're like those eyes saw what I'm seeing like not
too long ago or you'd see like a tattoo and you'd be like oh this person like went to go get a tattoo once or it
always like struck me when they would have like painted nails cuz I'd be like oh you painted your nails not knowing
that that's just mere moments before. Yeah. Right. So it it is interesting because everything that's monumental
really happens in one second. Yeah. Yeah. Truly. And there there's only before and after
and being present in that one second and being aware in that one second is actually rare when you're it feels rare
to me when your consciousness aligns with what's going on. Usually so much of life
feels like you're playing catchup to a moment that just existed. Mhm. Mhm. Truly. Especially with how our lives go
now, like everything is so busy, so instant like that. Mhm. Yeah. And the influence is is to take
your train your mind off the moment. Yes. Yeah. It's very strange that that that
distraction is beneficial to big groups of people that own things. Yeah. Yeah. It's so true. We're all taught to not be
in our own head or in our own thoughts in any given moment. Yeah, like the suggestions like why
don't you get out of the moment for a second? Come with me. It was Yeah. Look at this. And and I that's very
strange and and in the catacombs I felt so there because I was going through this
physical stuff and and we were so locked in and before each song would happen for
30 seconds we would we agreed to say nothing before after. So we're just you're almost like
this is it. This is it. And so you felt so in the center of your feet like there is no yesterday, there
is no tomorrow. We're underground. I don't know what time it is. It's like a casino. Like no clocks, no doors.
The most Macob casino you can ever think of. Big wrist, right? Yeah. That's that's exactly how I'd
imagine it would feel like just overwhelmingly present. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I I think because everyone
else in there represented the past and and there is no future because you there is no you don't know what time it that
absence of where am I forces you to be stuck there and the past of these people sort of pressing
against your backside you know it's like a an invisible force. There's there's a bunch of sections in there
actually that they kind of don't show because they're not as sort of sexy I think ultimately.
Yeah. Where they just ran out of they must have run out of people to do this kind of
exotic work, you know, as the pillars are decorated, the the walls are decorated, stacked, and then there's a
couple sections where someone was like, I can't anymore. I'm done. Too tired. Too tired. It's just like,
you know, bones in piles as far as the eye can see. It's like real where clearly someone put in their two
week notice. That must just be insane, though. Just a pile of bones right next to you. That's
a sight. You know, I don't know if you would have the same reaction, but mine was was
something akin to there's a big pile of bones. I look over, I thought, am I supposed to do something? Am I supposed
to start? Yeah. Should I start here? Like what do I do? Do I arrange these beautifully?
I know. I heard my dad's voice like, "Get to work and get over there and start piling."
That's a pile. What do I do with this? Yeah. Like can't That's like a to-do pile.
Yeah. Like we can't just leave that. I think I would feel the same. I'm a completionist. I need to do this. Like
feels unfinished. Yeah. Well, that's it feels almost like sensory deprivation and sensory overload
all at the same time. Mhm. Like another thought I had too actually in there was um that because you're in this
century deprivation tank, you know, you're I can I I it was so immediate to picture people working away for
countless hours not understanding the reference and sort of getting in the zone.
Yeah. Of stacking. It's like I'm just doing femurs. What are you doing? What are you doing right now?
Hey, how are your skulls coming, Gary? Gary, that's like Gary, I love what you've done with that
corner. I was just going to say, I love what you've done with the femurs. It looks
great. Somebody's like, you should add a tibia in there. And I think it will it will
really offset it. It'll set it off. I'm not trying to be a jerk, but I think you should add some tibas.
Yeah. You know, we can't There's Larry's over here doing metacarpals, and that isn't
You got to get on Larry's level. Like, it's really You're not You're Gary. You're no Larry.
I don't want to. Step it up, Gary. Come on, man. Step up, Gary. And that's the month again is Larry.
How do you not think of that when you're down there? Like I've honestly I would have to be thinking about that.
Well, I think I accidentally turn anything into the office, you know, just like Oh, that's Elena.
As you should. Business vernacular. Yes, as you should. That's Elena in our office every single day.
Yeah, I turn everything into that. Yeah. Now, do you I know that you have been really fascinated with the catacombs,
the Paris catacombs for a long long time. Do you remember when you first became interested in them and what drew
you to it? It was somewhere between the ages of eight and 10. I I I my my the way I deal with time is at this
point in my life by when records came out. I don't know what year, you know, I'll just be like, "Oh, that
was Songs from the Deaf era." That era. So I my childhood is like the window is eight or 10 in a in a history
class. Um it was in a book and there was a brief discussion about this time frame and it immediately
struck me. I think as a kid, you never think you're gonna die and and I I think especially in the
United States, there's a tendency to say, "Oh, no one's going to die." You don't No one's dying.
We're good. Wait. Oh, if you just There's a panic. Mhm. You know, um when the only way to know
you're alive is to not be dead. Yeah. And so I I I I think um I've always been yeah obsessed with the
transitions of life. Like I think because I grew up right where the desert starts, you know,
there's mountains and snow and pine trees at the top of the mountain comes down and there's uh then the
desert begins at the base mountains. But in that spot in that transition is where all the nutrients are. It's where
all the good stuff. This is where the oasis is. Yeah. Are it's where all the palm trees are.
It's why they're there. And so I think I've always been obsessed with one foot in each location.
And things like the catacombs where life and death merge and then they make art.
Mhm. That that's been my fascination for most of my life. It's like being split in
half where and on that line is where the art is, you know. Oh, that's so cool. That is that's very
Yeah. Yeah. So, I just got kind of obsessed with I I I wouldn't say death because I It's
not that. It's that there's a beauty in that and that the only way to live is to know
that you won't forever. I love that. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's cool too that in the Paris
catacombs cuz like I think over here we can treat death like you were saying like it's like like we don't talk about
it and just like taboo. Shut up. You're fine. Like everybody's going to shut up. The thing about death is shut
up. Yeah. like just shut up about it. Like we don't want to hear it. And then it's
like then the Paris catacombs is like this like I don't want to say like a celebration
but it's like a trip to it and it makes it like this beautiful like these bones are not these people anymore. Their
souls have gone wherever souls go and now they are here but like you know they're here but not here kind of thing.
Like it's like what you were saying of one foot in one foot out. It kind of celebrates life and death all at the
same time. Yeah. I I I I I I think it is 100% a celebration. Yeah. And and I also think, you know, you keep
someone alive when you're talking about them. Yeah. And you know, I had my very best friend
pass away a couple years ago. And uh we talk about him constantly and we have this sort of frienda I suppose you know
um just over here on that eagle table. Oh yeah right. and and uh oftentimes I'll just touch this little sculpture on
his head on the head and be like, "Hey, buddy." You know, I just buddy. So, I think these sort of celebrations that
I suppose become an altar in their own way are just cool and they that sort of thing gives me relief. But I also have
gallows humor and I'm sure Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was how I survived working in a morg.
Yeah, a lot of gallows humor. Yeah, it's I I believe gallows humor is a really successful way to when when
life is good, it's funny, and when life is terrible, it's really funny. Exactly. As it should be. Yeah. It
demystifies. It takes out the scariness of it all. It's adding levity is always the way to go.
Especially when you find yourself in a situation where you where you realize, well, what am I going to do?
Yeah. Right. Even that question, it's kind of funny sometimes. It is. Because a lot of times the answers are
not great. So, it's like, might as well laugh at it. I'm I'm healed. I'm all good. But when I
got diagnosed with a with cancer, the um I was behind these uh I was in a wheelchair and was behind these four
other wheelchairs and I got the convoy pushed up and the doctor who I knew, so we were friendly. I knew he said, "Hey,
real quick. Um you have this either this type or this type and I'll be back in 5
minutes." And I started laughing so hard. They're like, "Damn, it's like a server stopping by and checking in with
your table." These other four these other four people went. They're like, "What?"
in a row. Almost like a synchronized swimming team in wheelchairs. Oh my god. And I thought And I started I looked at
them and started laughing and I was like, "Who wants to go jogging?" I love that. That's
laughing. I turn around and yell, "Of course I do." I look I was like, "Of course I do. Oh,
of course. I thought it was funny and tragic and uh it was it's okay for these things to be
everything. Yeah. Absolutely. Or or or um uh it's okay to admit they're everything. They already are
everything. Exactly. Things are rarely just one thing. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. You got to have fun with it.
Yeah. Have fun with it. Have fun. And speaking of having fun, people have fun with the catacombs
apparently. Yeah. Oh, sorry. I turned it dark already. Oh, no. We'll keep turning it dark. So,
you're morbid. You're good. It's called morbid. Exactly. We'll we'll either lead you to
the darkness or we'll follow you. What's our show description? It's like a light-hearted nightmare. Yeah. So, it's
all the nightmare. A nightmare. Yeah. Yeah. You're in the right place. Well, apparently, did you hear about the
movie theater that they found in the Paris catacombs? I did. Isn't that insane? because I obsessed
that the the good part about the internet is I have obsessed and I've watched fake videos and real videos and
you know the movie theater you got to tell everyone about the movie theater it was so it was they found it in 2004
which to me always I always am like that was like 5 years ago and then I'm like no that wasn't
it's like over 20 years ago which is insane like damn but they found an entire cinema set up
in the Paris catacombs The people had set up a professional theater. It had a screen, a projector. It had a bar. It
had a restaurant set up, seating. It was stocked with food, a dinner table, a big dinner table.
You could sit down like they had an illegal electrical system set up and like we thought lux level was cool.
Yeah. I'm like, how? My first thing is like how did you get all that down there? Like what entrance did you go in?
Cuz I don't think the illegal entrances are very big. Well, the interesting thing is that the I so I met a couple
cataphiles and um what I come to understand is that there are so many entrances.
Mhm. The um limestone mine that is what it was required such ventilation and and is
is so vast. It's like 200 kilometers worth passageways and openings and and so there were so many entrances and
exits that you know they sort of molehole the city that way and there's many times where there'll be
steel double doors and they open to a stairwell that goes into the catacombs or a manhole.
Yeah. And you think to the sewer and it's like nah dropping in. Yeah. And it's a ladder
and I love I love secret societies. Me too. Unless I'm not included and then I hate
them and then they're lame. They can't be too secret. Yeah. What's your problem? But but I
love the idea that you know that the I don't know if it's true or not but on the subject of this cinema dinner club
which I love. Um the authorities were down there looking for something completely different. They see this in
this one of the grander open areas there that can house this size thing and um apparently they discover this and then
they say they're going to come back tomorrow with a bunch of people. Yes. And they find it's all completely gone.
I love and there's just a note on the floor that says do not try to find us. That is
my favorite part of the story. Don't try to find us. So chill. I love that it was like be very
Don't even try. It's amazing. I want to be part of that club so badly. It feels like a cartoon where like they
turn to the right and then they turn to the left and everything's gone and you're like, "How did that happen?" Like
Scooby-Doo. Very. But someone who kind of is high up in that club is a very clever person.
Yes. A mastermind. It's one thing to take everything away and it's another thing to say, "And by the way,
as you leave, you know, there's something very very sexy about that." So badass. It is so badass.
Yeah. It's It's quite I find that quite hot. Agreed. Agreed. And a unanimous decision.
Yeah. A unanimous decision that that is hot. But we're like, "Hey, if you're out
there, we're listening. We love you. My number has a five in it at Just saying. Well, in on the same topic of
like I'm sure things you've come across. You must have come across the video tape
that they found. Um, which one? The one of lost or or you know trying or feeling
they've seen something and running running and dropping the video camera. Yeah. And it drops into like a puddle. You
hear the splash and everything. I want to know if that's real. It is. No. Unfortunately, I just know in my
bones that's not real. See, I was so worried it wasn't. No, I feel in my bones it is.
Really? My bones are more optimistic. I think they are. They're very optimistic bones.
And I'm not I'm not pessimistic by any stretch because I want it to be real so bad.
Yeah. I want that to be real, you know, because so much of the catacombs um are are
illegal to explore. I mean, we're the only people to legally play there. Yeah, but there there's been in the in the
open sections, you know, these all these tunnels come to these various open, you
know, um sort of knuckles that they the the veins come off of. That's what I've come to understand.
I love picturing it like that. I know. And um in these sort of knuckle rooms that are not as huge as it would seem,
but um but some are bigger than others. Um there's been, you know, raves that have happened.
That's wild. That's so scary to me. Apparently the 80s and 90s that was like um in in in rave cultures inception
which I always loved. You know in my first band when I was 18 or 19 I went to a rave
and it you know was like six numbers to get to and I was fascinated with it because it was like punk rock without
any politics and it's like a secret society kind of thing like a speak easy. It's very much
that. Yeah. And and the music was extremely intense and really simplified. Mhm. And it was just pounding and it's just
and like the idea that that would occur in multiple numbers and the secret society that was about
I I just love escapism. See the value and escaping the real world. Yeah. Um not all the time but using it as a
tool to like cope. Yeah. And get you get the pressure in the right spot. Yeah. Equalize the right level.
Equalize. Right. Right. Exactly. And the idea that this would have occurred in the catacombs amongst
um these bones and in this scenario and underground you can't hear it. I mean you want to talk underground it's it's
just underground as underground. Yeah. Yeah. It's legitimately underground. It's that so legit, you know?
Like that's crazy. I just think of the fact that you like when you're at a rave or at like a super loud concert, you
hear that like you feel that in your heart. Yeah. In in like the beat kind of way.
I feel like it would just collapse the catacombs that I would be horrified. That's my fear. That was my fear
watching you guys perform was I was like, are you worried of a collapse? Worried?
Yeah. Well, I I'm I'm claustrophobic. Oh, are you really? Yeah. And and many of the places I had
to go, I'm 6'5, so I had to duck. I was gonna say there's a there's a part where you're walking through this little
passage and your head is barely scraping that ceiling. Yeah. You know, I'm just sort of I'm
looking for and reveling in moments where um I the situation is clearly in control and I'm not. So I therefore I
can't be in control. Like I I look for especially through music, I look for these moments where
in those moments where you understand control has been taken away. I I feel like those are the moments to
where I I think, okay, so the only thing to do is I just need to be myself and surrender to this. I I'm not in control.
And there and I love that feeling of being out of control and the risk that's associated with it. So there was a few
places that's shuttering. That is my fear. It It is because I feel like there's nothing else to do but be yourself.
There's nowhere else to be. Yeah. It's It's a really positive I always I even have this on my mic stand on the
floor. It just says it's too late. Yeah. All the rehearsal and all that stuff. It's over now.
Yeah. You just got to go. It's too late. Just do it. Or as Oscar Wild said, "Be yourself. Everyone else
is taken." And so I realized there were some lowhanging areas I would not be able to
recognize. And I was like, if I hit my if I hit myself or hit my head, that's just the way this goes.
Like, that's just something that's will occur. It's just inevitable. I'm not interested in hitting my head.
I'm not going to go out of my way to do it on purpose. But if it happens, just sort of say,
that's what happens when the ceiling's low. And if the blood flows, just let it flow. Keep going.
Let it flow. Just don't don't do anything, you know? just allow yourself to to feel
whatever's going to happen and just kind of continue on as you were. You know, honestly, that's probably the best way
to get out of like a a panic moment in those situations. I was going to say I respect your
approach to life. I got to take this on. Well, I mean, you know, you don't always
find yourself there, but in that moment, in that place, and because I had, you know, we don't have to get into it too
much, but it's like because I was so not well. Yeah. And so there was like uh always
this undercurrent of like ow ow ow ow ow going on. But I'm really thankful for that because
it connected me to that space. Yeah. Because when you once you walk off this, you know, there's this spiral staircase
that you go down that's really tight and you just kind of you go right in a corkcrew motion
just continuously. Yeah. It's like 240ome steps to go up and down, you know, and but once you get off this steel
thing, you get in this limestone, the ceiling's dripping, the floor starts to crunch under your feet with gravel. It's
sort of like you enter the belly of this Yeah. thing. You kind of go back into this
womb a little and it's like, you know, clean up your womb. Go to your womb. Don't come back. No.
you go on this thing and you sort of, you know, I just got really connected to this organic thing. I was in having my
own troubles. I'm seeing all this, you know, where where we all will end up. It couldn't have been a better
situation. Like it doesn't matter if it hurts. It doesn't matter if you hit your head. It
doesn't matter. It it doesn't matter anymore because we're we're here now. Yeah.
Are you are you going to do it or not? It's too late. Too late. Yeah. Can't turn back.
But there's something really um sort of beautiful about all the rest of this is done now.
Yeah. You know, I think as a former mortician employee that that would probably make sense, too.
It definitely does. Not saying you don't. Cutting hair was not like this. So, no
offense taken. I mean, I guess there's no going back when you cut off too much. You know,
definitely that way. Like a bad die job. Yeah, bad die job. On a on a whim, I've shaved mine and
it's clearly too late. But there could be going back cuz it'll grow back. Exactly.
Yeah, true. All right. Well, we kind of got into it like now that we've touched on your
performance. So, let's get into it a little deeper. How long did it take you guys to film and what was the prep work
like? Well, we filmed in just one day. Oh, one day. That's nuts. Yeah. Well, you know, I'm not a
perfectionist. I like, as I said, I like the risk and I like um I like it to be just as it is,
right? So, we knew that we were going to get complete takes of a song and we knew we
were going to not fix correct, you know, edit. We were just going to let it be. And I'm glad we chose that because
whatever plans you make above ground did not might not translate. No. Well, you think I think this,
right? Yeah. We we really should this. And as soon as you descend those stairs, it was it was so clear that the
catacombs already exists as it exists. Mhm. You will participate in what it's telling you to do.
The catacombs decide. You plan the catacombs laughs. Yeah, that's actually the correct way to say
that. That's my That's the real phrase. So, it was more like an improv what I imagine an improv class was. Whatever is
thrown at you, you just say yes and let's go. And so when we once we the night before
we did a walkth through as soon as it had closed and they and they had they said to us, "You have an hour." Okay.
You know, they wanted to They're like, "Wow." I mean, they they weren't they weren't
they were excited we were there, but they were like, "Um, take an hour." Like, we don't know what's happening
here. So, yeah. And I think there was just a lot of what are you gonna do? What are you
gonna And as we walked, we just said, "Well, we can go here. We can go here. We we
can do this. We" And we just uh the team we worked with was so good at utilizing
our all of our collective excitement that you really just move at the speed of inspiration.
Yeah. And you move at the speed of excitement. And if something feels like then you
just move on. Yeah, that makes sense. And it became clear because we're using battery powered things, you know, became
clear to me I can move around. I can when you know just walking around that pillar was just in the moment like I'm
going this way right here. I go I I don't know. I just want to see and and you know sometimes if there's a a
camera here you're for me personally I'm like my natural instinct is get that thing off of me.
Yeah. And so walking relate to that. Yeah. You're like, I'm gonna leave you back there.
Bye. But there's there's mistakes and there's things. I mean, you're hearing take two
of the first song, you're hearing take three of four takes. Wow. Oh, wow. It feels really nice to be in this
moment, have played something twice and say, "That's enough. That's enough. It's
enough." you know and and uh yeah so it like I say the turning over the control to the place and saying
not being a perfectionist about it right and saying that's as good as I can do that I don't know what else to say
that's that's you know it's nice that feels nice actually it sounds like that's just the way you
have to approach it down there I I think in a lot of things um it's it seems Think perfection is an ideal you
strive for but not something to expect to to actually Nobody is perfect. So what makes you
think you're going to get there, right? How do you expect to actually get there?
It's not even a, you know, and I I I reckon perfect would be boring because it's free of all mistakes.
That's true. And sometimes the mistakes are the best part. It's true. Well, friction is is the most glorious
thing of all time. It's how the universe is made. It's how babies are made. Valid
music is made. And so I think you're looking to find something to borrow friction from
and enjoy the rub, you know, and so I think down there it's so imperfect, which makes it so classic in there
because we really we really are second fiddle to that location. I think that's makes this
um makes me so proud of this thing is that we're almost sort of less important than what's happening
than just the environment. Yeah. You all worked so it all worked so well together. Everything compliments
the other, you know. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. You know, I uh I'll tell you, I couldn't go back up and
down the stairs. I'd gone up and down the stairs about 12 times and I just I just couldn't do it. And the French love
lunch and so as do I. I love lunch too. I was just like I love lunch. Um so everyone breaks for lunch and uh and
I just couldn't do it and I had a cot that I could lay down in between takes and so I just said I'm fine. I'm just
going to stay down here. So I was the only person in the catacombs for about an hour and you know we're deep in
there. I I think it's it's got to be somewhere between 50 and 100 meters deep at various spots.
Yeah. And um so I'm deep and I'm I'm many hundreds of meters in, you know, 200 meters in more in this maze. And it's
all I'm hearing is the ceiling dripping and nothing else and the air gently going.
That's cozy. That is cozy. And I I uh I thought if the lights go out, this is going to be the craziest army crawl I've
ever done. Thank God. Yes. And I thought I'm just not going to try to go anywhere, you know. And then but I
thought there's over six million people here. If I if there's a chance to be haunted,
oh yeah, this is it. You're not alone. That's prime time, you know. Yeah. I just said this is it and it's
too late, you know. It's too late. And what I what I found really interesting is that maybe it had
to do with the physical state I was in, you know, where my body's just humming and I have a kind of a pretty high
fever. But I I realized something about the word haunting cuz it's not that's not bad. It just isn't one or the other.
It's just this kind of like the waves coming and like because I felt so welcomed and embraced there.
Oh, I love that. that it gave me peace. I'm not going to lie, I I was doing a lot of this at first.
Yeah, of course. Naturally, you know, and um and I never got up. Once I sat down, I just was sitting in
my cot. I'm looking around and I said, "Oh, whatever you're going to do, let's just have let's just have it.
Do your best. Do your worst." And I got to say the overwhelming feeling was so embracing and it was a bit like don't
just play here, stay here, you know, and and I uh I laid down and I'm looking around and I and it I just it lolled me
to sleep and I fell asleep for the first time in a long time. You took a nap in the [ __ ]
catacombs. Yeah, that's some gangster [ __ ] That's really cool. And and I I I woke to the sound of young
two young interns, a boy and a girl, speaking French. Oh god. And they were kind of whispering.
They're like, "Is this guy dead?" No, I I my c was my cot was in a little bit set back into this hallway which was
not really lit except they couldn't see you. So they're like, "What?" So I was in 100% pitch black.
in a mind of darkness. Even more gangster Josh Jubo where it was like I when I would turn around I
couldn't see my hand until I put it up to the to the light but down the hallway I was like nothing
right I hear their feet softly on the gravel. I hear them speaking French and they walk kind of right by me and I sit
up and I said what time is it? And they go, "You ruined their lives in that moment.
You ruined their collective lives. You took at least 5 years off of both of their lives.
Did they die then?" Wow. And then they disappeared and then they were It was so weird. They did crazy
dematerial. They immediately turned and you know French is their first language. So they
immediately turned and sort of I understand enough French. They were swearing in French. And then he was
like, "What? What are you doing? Like you're like just napping. French French French uh uh transition.
What are you doing? These young kids that were like interns. They probably weren't being paid a
single scent. Like you can't do that. Had the audacity to be like, are you out of your [ __ ] mind?
Are you just sleeping in a dark corner? A little bit. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah, it's fine.
Maybe a lot of bit. Oh my god, that's amazing. Honestly though, as a parent, I understand why
that was probably the best sleep you've ever gotten. Yeah, cuz I feel like I'm not a parent, but that does make
sense. Like the the idea of that is so horrifying at first and then I'm like, actually, no, that sounds kind of
awesome. Just kind of like grade a spot 80 ft underground just in a dark corner.
There was just this feeling of of pressing onto you. Yeah. It's just like like leaning like you know when your dog
just sort of decides to go like this a dead weight on you. You're like the [ __ ] are you doing?
I got a leaner leaner. The catacombs is a leaner. Wow. That's I think it it closes in on you.
Yeah. And I had no sense of claustrophobia obviously no sense of time. And so I also think
that piece of there is nothing, you know, it doesn't matter what's happening up upstairs, it reminded me of there
was, you know, I have a couple moments of things that are completely unexplained in my life. I have this
moment in Pennsylvania. So, my first band was called Kais and and we traveled in a van and we met these two gals that
were DJs at like a um a really little station, a station that would play us at the time. We did this interview on the
radio and they said, "Well, you know, we live in Pennsylvania, which is, you know, extremely haunted, and we have a
ghost in our house named Isaac who we've seen from the waist up." Oh, that's you know, we live in a
200-year-old farmhouse in the in rural Pennsylvania. And you know, we were as a collective,
some people believed more than others. I was a complete skeptic of, you know, I want to believe in ghosts, but I need I
need empirical evidence and it can't it can't just go bump in the night, especially in a woodhouse that's
creaking and contract. Fair enough. That's how I am usually, right? And and I want the science to
prove the the ethereal, right? And so, um, these girls were like, "You should come stay at our house whenever you're
passing through next time." And so, about two months later, we were on our second kind of tour. And so, we
did, and we went to this farmhouse, and our bass player, Scott, is married uh to
uh an indigenous tribal leader's daughter. Oh, wow. And and so he was like uh calling her and saying what should we do
or not do you know when very he's like taking notes. Yeah. Yeah. And she was she basically said um
don't um antagonize. Yeah. Don't ever provoke. Don't ever provoke and don't drink.
O the latter the ladder kind of sucks. Yeah. So we start drinking and crunch that one immediately.
This is like a I would say a 10 bedroom. Very much older and sort of not dilapidated but not palatial. It was you
know rustic. Yeah. Rustic. Very very much rustic. Honestly Elena and I both grew up in a
house like that with less bedrooms. Yeah. But something that is terrifying when you look at it.
Yeah. It's like very ominous looking. It was like I instinctually uh don't love this.
He said, "I actually don't really want to stay here." Well, I was probably 19 years old, so I
was very blasze like ah I don't love this, but we're going in. Yeah. And we had a video camcorder and the
singer John and I I I said, "Can we investigate this place?" We we were going to sleep in the attic.
An A-frame open attic. Oh, damn. Was the epicenter of activity for that reason. Of course it was.
Stop. That's the best. And for that reason, we were going to sleep there. So, yeah. I'm like jealous of you right now.
I know. So, we the singer John and I go room to room opening every shifer robe and
ammoir, every closet door that had servants stairwells and stuff. So kitchens would have a small door and
then go up a spiral staircase. I personally went to every single room in this house with John and antagonizing
this thing. Wow. You ignored all the notes. Doing exactly what you weren't going.
I mean it wasn't aggressive. It wasn't like come and get me. What's going on with it? It was kind of going, "Woo!"
Like, "This is a haunted toilet seat. Whoa." Lift it up. Being very 19-year-old boy about it.
Yeah. Just a complete bone head. Um, which I maintain to this day, by the way. As do we.
I've cultivated. It's worked out. Yeah. I mean, so far, I'd say it's been here. So, you know,
good work if you can get it. As you as you well know, you'll never work a day in your life.
Yes, she loves that personality. Stay stupid, my friend. So, um we go room to room methodically,
first floor, second floor, attic, right? And um I can vouch for opening every single clo I said, "Can we open your
closets and do this thing?" They're like, "Go ahead." You know, up on top in the closet, feeling above. I'm tall
enough. So is John. There's no stone unturned. I guarantee you. We set our sleeping bags up in a circle.
Oh, that's fun. With our feet in the cir in the center of the circle and there was our manager,
Kathy, her husband, our salman, this guy, John, and the four of us. And so there's six of us sleeping on a hard
floor. And you know, if you want to use the restroom, you have to go down to the
second, you know, floor and take this creaky staircase. And the camera was in the middle and I would wake up
intermittently and just film around. And the amount of times I woke up was ungodly that night, I think, cuz you're
expecting something. Oh, yeah. You're on guard. And every time I woke up and opened my eyes, I
would look over at one of my band members and their eyes would be wide open just like
they heard your eyes. Our bass player, Scott, is quick to be like, there are things here for sure.
You know, it's very and very quick so quick to do that that I was like, oo, immediately you're like, no, you had to
bone head it out. Somebody untied my shoes around here. You know, I get I being a total an
[ __ ] essentially a bonehead as a coping mechanism, right? And so no one slept. Nobody slept.
And I sat up multiple times and filmed around. And although the experience was eerie, you know, and I heard noises
because it's a allwood home, I my dad's a contractor. I understood what I'm hearing is more than likely is not
there's no evidence here of something else. the house is settling. He said, "I actually just should call my dad over."
And we all finally fell asleep in the early morning hours. And we all all sort of woke up together. And as we're waking
up stretching, we're like, "Oh, dude, that was a terrible night's sleep." All agreeing. We kind of stand up and we're
stretching. And Scott, our bass player, reaches down and in the center of where our feet is, the little circle I I guess
you could call it, was, you know, about this big, a little more than shoulder width. Scott reaches down and picks up
this accordion and starts playing it and goes, "Oo, that's amazing." Only the only problem is is that we
don't own an accordion. I was literally just going to say there was just an accordion
and some of the keys were missing. um like the some of the ivory on the keys and it was unnapped. So just to sort of
describe the accordion which is one of my least favorite things to do in life but purpose
describe accordians. Yeah. I truly hate it. I'm going to do it here. Go for it. But clearly it's about pushing air in
this vented system. Yeah. Air. So, one of the terrible things about accordion is when you move it,
when it's unnapped, uh, the the snap keeps the vent closed, but when you unsnap it, it goes, "Hey."
And it's constantly like the worst or one of the best things. It's the [ __ ] worst. And so, the
reason being is that it's like a needy friend that's needy all the time. It goes, "Hey,
hey, hey, hey, um, guys." So he picks up this accordion that's unnapped and starts going. Scott was
acting like me basically. He went full bonehead and he's like, "Dude," he's like, "Dude, who is this?"
You're like, and and individually each of us are like, "Well, it's obviously not [ __ ]
mine. It's not mine. You have an accordion." And it starts from giggling to confusion
to um disbelief to anger. We start arguing who brought the accordion. Who who put this here?
Yeah. And John and I start saying, "We filmed this whole house. I didn't see an accordion anywhere. There was no
accordion anywhere." I I want to tell you something that doesn't get said a lot. You can't hide an accordion.
No, you really can't. You know what? That doesn't get said enough, I think. Tell tell more people that.
Yeah. How many [ __ ] dinner parties do you go to where somebody tries to say that
you can hide an accordion? Like, spread the word or I brought you something. Here's an accordion.
What do you get for the person that doesn't want something? Um, but um it it turned into anger and fingerpointing. It
was like, who put this here? You put this here. I No, I didn't. How could I put this? where did I get this from? It
turns into John and I saying uh I can assure you like we searched everything. So unless this is in the deep recesses
of something, not to mention um having gone to take a leap in the middle of the night myself out of sheer like I have
nothing to do and I can't walk accordion going down the squeak squeak squeak squeak like you could not have
infiltrated our circle of six. No. and plopped an open accordion and you were Isaac because it would have
said, "Hey, I don't I wish I have said pllopped, but whatever. Whatever you do, you couldn't have pulled this off
because it wasn't just me that didn't sleep well." And then we approached the two girls downstairs and we're like, we
bring the accordion and we said, "Who's is this?" We found your accordion. Haha.
And to my amazement, I saw the look on their face. They said, "We don't have an accordion."
They said, "Why the [ __ ] would we have an accordion? We like music. What would I have that? That would actually
be really embarrassing for us." Our Zidico band. Is that what you're saying? So So they freak out and they said,
"This is Isaac. That is not us. This is This is Isaac's accordion." I love that. Isaac just like brought an
accordion. He said, he said, "You say you're musicians." Musicians. Make music. Look,
look, other spirits. Look, musicians. And you know, this is a farmhouse that had been a hospital in the Civil War.
This is So, they needed some entertainment. Th This is a place where accordians thrived
apparently. Yeah. And continue to. I didn't realize later it was an accordion farm.
That that made sense then. Picture watermelons that don't sound good, but they just
right out of the ground. Their shock and horror be started to become ours. As we get in the van to
drive off with our trailer, no one spoke for a couple hours. And then we get a phone call. They took it to a local
music store immediately and said, "What what the [ __ ] am I holding?" And sure enough, the music store owner said,
"You're holding a huge mistake." No. He said, "Get that the [ __ ] out of here. You're holding an abomination."
I said, "This was a music store. No, get this thing out." No, he said, "Oh, wow.
This is beautiful. This is like turn of the century. This thing is a this thing is almost 100 years old. This was this
was in the early 90s." Wow. He said, "Wow." Yeah. He's like, "Some of the keys are missing, but you know, I
mean, you know, if you fix it up, this could be worth $7." No. He was like, "No, this is extremely old.
This is the oldest accordion I've ever seen." Wow. And so I don't have an experience with
an apparition, but I have something I cannot explain that is so bizarre that almost I still feel almost a little
foolish even like like I don't for years after this every once in a while it would be like just between you and me
did you put the accordion there or not? hit you or not, just say yes for real. And I have it somewhere on film, you
know. Um, and apparently these the footnote to this is the two girls started seeing full body to the floor
Isaac all the time and so they moved within a month. He's a full body Isaac. Well, you
completed him when you played the accordion. Full body Isaac, which sounds like a
really terrible male strip. It does. Full body Isaac. Yeah. Welcome to full body Isaac.
Damn, I don't want that. I don't want full body. Most people most people don't want full body Isaac cuz I was I was
honestly concerned that they heard from the way they saw from the waist up Isaac. I was like,
how? No, but you know what people say? But then you heard full body Isaac and you're like what?
You said I don't want that either. I don't want that. But sometimes people say that if you are in like a haunted
place or you live in a haunted accordion farm that when you see half of someone,
it's because there's been renovations since they passed. Oh yeah. And they're actually like stuck in
whatever that full room was, but maybe you've done some kind of renovation. So they're like stuck in between or they're
showing like they're in covered unrenovated. They're unrenovated. They're walking on like the previous
place where the floor was. So you'll see like waste below coming from the ceiling.
I forget the hotel that we covered once, but we covered a hotel and there had been a fire there
and somebody was seeing like a Native American man in the now hotel's dining room which had previously been two
rooms. So he was upstairs but people his feet see him like halfway out of the ceiling.
Who knew open concept could really free the room? It does. That's why I'm a big fan of it.
many ways. I'm setting ghosts free and my space is limitless. Well, you know, I we passed around a lot
of discussion and and in particular with these two girls. I wish I still knew them or remember their names. It's been
so many years because I'm so old, but you know, there was a lot of positivity eventually uh about this being an
offering and a token of of sort of like, "Hi guys. Hey. Hi guys. Look, look. I heard your
musicians. Look. Yeah. Check out my [ __ ] accordion. He's like, I know music, too.
A little bit of a Labrador vibe to that. Yeah. Very golden retriever. He's a lab,
Isaac. All my other experiences of unexplained things have always been positive in the
same manner. They've never been negative in any way, shape, or form. Oh, that's a good thing. And the same
feeling I had that it's I feel the same way about the catacombs and why I fell asleep
that I just was like I felt like you know sit lay down take Yeah. They were just like tucking you
in. Sit lay down. Play an accordion when you wake up. Yeah. We'll leave you. Thankfully I wasn't asked.
The catacombs Parisians have way more taste than that. There you go. Well, they they have the little ones,
you know. Oh yeah. Tasteful. Yeah. I I forget what those are called. Annoying. That's right.
That's it. That's it. Nailed it. Also, respect the way you made that story come full circle. That was That was
impressive. That was Well, I'm just realizing that I and I am realizing this for the first time that
as I say, my experiences in this realm have never been negative. Just lucky, I guess.
Bye. And with that, I leave you. Good luck everyone. Before you actually do walk away from
us, do you want to play Catacombs themed? Would you rather? Absolutely. Let's do this.
Are you starting us off? I was going to say you should crack your knuckles because it's going to get weird in here.
Stretch a little bit. Get ready. This is accordion. I'm already stretched. I stretched way
before this. Got to prep the accordion. All right. So, the first would you rather is you're
in the catacombs. You find a secret tunnel and it's marked don't. That's it. What do you do? Do you go in anyway or
That's for sure. Sorry. I don't feel like that's the second choice is do you avoid it and
be forever haunted by a ghost whose size coward every time you go to sleep? It's
a hard choice. We know I'm I'm a don't person. In fact, I've always wanted to open a speak easy that
is just a neon sign behind a window. So, you just see and it just flashes don't.
That's a great idea. I think that's great. The place is called don't. So, you've
got you've hit me in in the center of my don't. Right in the fields. Right in the O of the don't.
I love it. So, you're going in. I'm I'm definitely going in. I think that's life is all about ignoring the
rules. Yeah. Finding which ones to ignore. Yeah, I think I'd go in at that point. I don't
want to listen to a ghost every time I'm going to sleep. I just don't want to be judged by a
ghost every night. That's the No, like I don't want to hear it. That's a reason to go. I I don't want to
hear it. I don't want to hear it. Yeah, we're judged by enough living people every day. I don't need cuz I
just picture some like [ __ ] ghost walking up to me right as I'm getting comfortable in bed just being like
coward. Coward and just like walking away and I'll just like I love that yours is full disdain just
like coward. They're disgusting. I What would yours be, Ash? How would it say coward?
I think it would have to be kind of like creepy. Like coward. See that? I'd just be like I'd be like
[ __ ] off. Yeah. Mine would be like coward. Yeah. Just like just a little school taunting
like coward. Very like sucker. See, mine's got disgust and that's why I simply Yeah. Yours is the harshest. Why?
Yours is yours is rooted in like a need for therapy. Yeah. It's It's rooted in judgment.
Yes. And I don't like it. I think Ash is sort of like coward. Yeah. See what I did there?
See that? I could kind of I'd be like, "All right, that's kind of funny." Every night. Yeah. Every night I'd be like,
"All right, bye." But I think I for some reason I'm shaking my head because yours is going
Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. It's a challenge. I don't take criticism well, so I'm just
going in. Yeah, that's true. I don't I love that yours is based on criticism. Like I'm not deal that's enough of that.
Yeah. I can't do it anymore. Yeah. I got to go in there. I don't want to hear it. I'm just annoyed.
I always think though when someone is saying you can't you can't do this. You cannot do that. I always think oh what
do you know? Like yeah I can I can do whatever I want. Step aside coward. Coward. And that's why you're going in
though. So that makes sense. Can we all say our versions of coward on together? Yeah.
Do you mind? Yeah. Ready? Ready? One, two, three. Coward. [Laughter] And that is a sound bite.
Mine has a face with it. That's the It's a visual. Mine has a hand motion. Mine is like gh.
All right. So, we're all going in. All right. Hopefully, we've all made it out. Question.
Yeah. If we've made it out alive. Uh-oh. We're now lost in the catacombs. This is like goosebumps. So, it's choose
your own adventure. So, this one scares me. I'm putting in a Z in. This is scary. So, who do we trust to
guide us out? Is it a Frenchspeaking bat with a drunking problem or drunk problem?
A drunking problem. Drunk already. Maybe we've drank. It was the effect for the question. I
was feeling that so hard. A French speaking You know, you have a drunking problem.
Look who's got the biggest drunking problems and not drunk. He just flies out of nowhere. He's like,
"Wee we don't have a drunk for I do not have a drunking problem." Gone. Sorry to interrupt. Go. I'm sorry.
That was great. There's that guy. Or there's a glowing skull, but he only answers any questions we have in riddles
and dad jokes. Choose your fighter. Who we leading? Who's who we letting lead us
out? The bat with a drunking problem speaks French. Then there's the glowing skull
that only does dad jokes and riddles. Yeah. I mean, if I'm honest, even though I
like to have a drink, like if I'm honest, I gotta go with the dad jokes. I love a dad joke. My husband is not yet a
dad, but he is perfecting his dad jokes right now. Oh, yeah. It's a lifelong process.
I love it. I have great respect for it. Yeah. John's favorite is he'll randomly say to
our girls, "Did you know that someone in this family is turning into an owl?" And
they'll say, "Who? Who?" And that's just adorable. And then he'll just be like, "Yeah,
gotcha. Gotcha." And every time now they've like caught on to it and they're like they're like
shut down that one. The adult that that would work on is who I want to hang out with.
Right. Who? But if if an adult would say who that's the person I need to be around.
Frankly, I might be that person. That's the person you need in your life at all times.
Take down my number. It has a five in it. It does. It has a five in it. We know that. Are you going dad jokes,
Elena? So, I'm really good at riddles and sort of like a brag. It's humble brag.
I'm sick of an unhumble brag. Okay. Oh [ __ ] I'm pretty sick of riddles. I'm really bad at riddles.
I'm good at them. That's why I keep you around. And I live with a dad. So, I'm fluent in dad jokes as well.
The Riddler's going with dad jokes. Yeah, I'm going with dad jokes. I don't know what I'm going with.
I don't understand French, but I the bat would be flying out of there, so I guess
I'd just follow. Yeah, but but you know, drunk flying. Yeah, I know. You know what happens there when you're
drunking and you're When you're drunk. Drunking and flying is against the law, they say.
Follow me. Boom. Right into the wall. Yeah. And then he's passed out and I have to wait even longer.
No. Then you have to walk into the wall cuz that's where he said to go cuz that's
what he did. What am I do? I'm doing what you say. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't want to. Okay.
Dad jokes and riddles. I'll just be with you. We're always together. Yeah. And I'll help you with the
riddles. Okay. You know, and I'll l the dash. Me and the Riddler. We're getting out of
here. Yeah. We're getting the hell out. All right. That works. All right. So, we
haven't gotten out quite yet. So, we awake at a catacomb rave. Who's your DJ? A spectral monk who mixes Gregorian
chance with dubstep. Picture that for a second. Take that in. or a talking skull
on a Roomba just screaming bone zone on loop. That would drive me [ __ ] crazy. You decide.
That second one would drive me crazy. Okay. But dub step like Yeah, I like that.
Right. But with the which sounds like you're in a really weird spa. Yep. But I think the Roomba thing would drive
me crazy. And when he's just yelling in the bone zone. Well, he was just yelling bone zone, but
he could yell in the bone zone, too. I mean, it wouldn't change how annoying that is. Um,
do you think that he would just be yelling it in the same tone or do you think he would remix it? Because we had
this discussion when we came up with the question. No, no, it would be so annoying. I I
already hear it's like bo b zone like I I I well no I think it would be different like me too the bone zone and
then it would be like you're in the and I that would drive me crazy. Yeah, that would be annoying.
I would be I would be in a tough spot not to assault this this glowing skull or excuse me this
talking this Roomba riding skull. Yeah, it's already making me go like look around for help. Like, am I alone here?
Someone else hates this with this guy. So, you're going Gregorian monk with dubstep.
I'm Gregorian that direction. Spectral monk is pretty fun. Yeah, I would say I like dubstep.
When you say spectral monk, that sounds like a book I would read. Absolutely. So, I feel like
this one about the spectral monk. Hell yeah. Yeah. Terrifying. Yeah. I think we're we can all be
unanimous on that. The one with the the Roomba too is the thing about a Roomba is that it always gets stuck.
So that thing would just be like beeping while it's like trying to back up too and it would be like yelling bone zone
and it's like Yeah. And I don't like that the the skull is piggybacking because to tell it
true, I once bought a Roomba and just, you know, at a very difficult time in my life. I would watch it and it would get
stuck and I would go, "Oh, look like it's stuck. It's stuck." It was a little heumba for
me. It was like he's over there. He want He loves this corner so hard. And he can't move. Poor thing. But then
you Who loves the corner over there? Who loves the corn? It's like a Yeah. Go clean that corner. You get over
there. So, I don't like that he's sort of bullying. Bullying really gets on my nerves. And so, I just uh I would slap
that skull and then I would I'd be Gregorian that way. Hell yeah. Gregorian out.
I agree. Okay. So, now you have to spend the night, which apparently you sort of
did halfway when you took your nap, but now sleep over. You've been there, done that. did it.
Spend the night in a special catacomb tomb. But the problem is either the walls whisper compliments all night.
Like weirdly specific ones, like your kneecaps are so powerful, or the floor is made of teeth, lots and
lots and lots of teeth from unknown origins, and they're warm warm teeth. Warm teeth and you don't know why. Or
weirdly specific compliments from the walls. Compliments make me want to barf. Me, too. I guess.
What if they were oddly specific, though? But that even makes me want to barf harder because they're then if they're
specific, they're so tailored towards you and not someone else, you know? It's not like you know how to
throw a great party, which is sort of broad and ambiguous and like everybody kind of knows how to
do that, but it but it's but it's like I love the way your mustache is coming in. I don't
know. You know, no one rocks that. Like I I just can't, you know, I compliments are a surefire way for me to sort of say
it was not great talking to you. Let's go. I'm going again. I'll be going now. I have teeth dreams recoccurring for my
whole life. Me, too. Same. And so, and I've had everything done in my teeth possible from being a total
[ __ ] throughout my life. Um Oh, god, this is actually hard. Do you want to go first? So, my I had the same thought
about the compliments are an absolute no-go for me because the second somebody compliments me, I'm like like I like
immediately shrink into I'm leaning in. So, I would just be huddled in extreme discomfort all night if they were
complimenting me. I'd be like, "Stop it." Yeah. Kind of squished like this all my heart rate would my blood pressure
would be up. It would just be bad. But teeth, I don't love teeth. I don't love walking on teeth. Have you
ever experienced warm teeth? Warm teeth might be nice. I was going to say like a heated floor.
It might be like this beach is not so bad. Yeah, it's just a little little bit chilly.
Don't forget unknown origins. So, we don't know if everybody's brushed these teeth.
That's the other thing though. It's unknown. So, I don't know. In my head, Canon,
these are clean teeth. Oh, I never saw clean teeth from a unicorn as far like I'm wearing my my slippers. I don't go
anywhere barefoot. So that way you can't do that. You can't do that. You're breaking the rules.
You can't do that. I can't go in my head cannon. No. God damn it. Oh, I love head cannon though.
Fire. I can't do it. Fire a rule breaker. You're changing the You can't do that.
You'reing the rules because they're unknown origin. And that was from the outset. Ash said that right.
And then I made it of known origin. That's And you're like, "These are from various
unicorns, which I love and pet every." That's beautiful. Yeah. Who wouldn't choose? I can't make
it known origins. All right. Unknown origins. I messed up. Different colors. Possibly different stanks. So the Here's
where I say the teeth. My mouth smells. The mouth smells disgusting. I don't know if you think
about that. Okay. Here though. I'm still staying with teeth. They're warm. Yep. Here. Hear me out. I don't ever
walk in bare feet. I don't walk in bare feet in my house. I always have socks on. I have a thing
about bare feet and also Okay, that's that's doable. I have a deviated septum, so I can't smell very well.
I do, too. So, to me, I'm walking on some shells on the beach in my head. Like, that's what
I'll tell myself. No. Oh, yeah. You're like, they're just shells and it's warm and you know what?
And I'm looking out. I can't smell. So, no. Yeah. Ash. Oh, so so completely on the contrast of
you, I have a great sense of smell. Like you do to a fault. I smell everything. Sense of smell.
Yeah. I'm not I'm not about that life. Um and I'm always barefoot. In fact, sometimes I leave here and I forget my
shoes here. Yeah. And I love compliments, so I'm going oddly specific compliments all the way.
That's kind of your ideal situation, actually. Actually, where would I sign up for that? I just
pictured you shoeless and comfy, smelling the clean air, just going like, "Thanks."
Yeah. Thank you so much. I agree. Every couple of minutes you're just like, "Thank you so much."
Yeah. This is this is my dream. I see you like sitting up randomly and just being like, "I know, right?" Or
like, "Do you really mean it? Are you serious? You're for real right now?" Yeah. I'm going compliments, man. I
think my deep-seated dislike of being brownnosed is going to push me in the tooth zone.
You guys are nuts. Your deviated septum is going to help you. Yeah. I mean, I can stab my brain on the
right side clear. I can and my left nostrils completely closed off. So, I Do you guys have the same DV?
I don't like this. We have a mirror DVD. That's where you've taken me, but I'm going to tooth it up.
Tooth it up. Oh, the crunch of the teeth though. I don't know. Yeah. And the stank. But again,
just get that deviated septum working and you're going to be But the smell of a brown noser is
overwhelming. Way worse. Hey, maybe they're not brown-nosing. Maybe they mean it. Okay.
Maybe they mean it. Brown nosers mean it. Trust me. But you don't know. Like what if the
walls are whispering it like really sarcastically? Like they're like, "Oh my god, I love how your eyebrows look
today." That's I'm saying you don't know. It doesn't say. Yeah. You don't know that wasn't in the
rules. You can't bend this. Yeah. You can't. They're just oddly specific. Specific, but we don't know how they're
said because there would certainly be a tired moment where you're just completely like
5-year-old tired. You're like, uh, yeah. You be like, "Enough out of you." Oh, no.
Are you serious right now with the compliments? That has the potential to ruin me if
they're sarcastic compliments. If they're being which, you know, cuz those are just criticisms.
Oh, that looks good on you, though. Oh. Oh, no. I would never sleep in. You already No, you already chose the
two. So, I can't change it. No, you already like What if the walls are like, "Oh my god, I wish I could
dress as comfortable as you do." I do dress really comfy. So, I'd be like, "Yeah, I'd [ __ ] try it.
I wish I could just not care." That's hecking mess right there. That's I wish the walls would, you know, saying
I wish I could dress as comfortable as good comfortable like that. I wish I could be comfortable being so
carefree. Classed up with all these skeletons. say, "Well, I bet you're uncomfortable,
asshole." And then we'll welcome you into the teeth room. I'll say, "Please let me in, you guys."
No, you'll say, "No, you chose this. Let me in your mouth, guys." Oh, man. Oh. Oh, man.
All right. So, we have a a couple more, but they're we're getting a little more like darker and realistic now.
Okay, cuz we're almost out, so it's got to be We're almost out. So, now we're on our
way out. Would we rather walk through waste deep water in a flooded tunnel or crawl through a dry but very narrow
passageway? I I this this is so simple for me for water. I'm I'm not crawling through a tight space.
I'm too big for that [ __ ] I And I shouldn't have even been employed to do that job. That's not
No. I fire myself from that job. Yeah. We're walking through the water. one where you're like this like just
like a little wiggle machine. I'm not I'm not I I'm not I can't You know when cave divers are like and
then I let the air out of my lungs and you're like what the [ __ ] Yeah. They're like I had to let all the
air out of my lungs so I could get smaller your bodily processes to get through there.
No. No. I don't want to talk about this part anymore. See? Yeah. And the greatest thing is we you choose
to do it. So I'm not doing it. No. I'm not doing it. I've seen the descent. I'm not doing
that. Yeah. Yeah. And frankly, I'm a little peeved that we even suggested this. This is too
much. This honestly, I know it was a little bringing it up. You just end the Zoom call. You're like,
"Fuck those. [ __ ] those ladies. We're done with them." This was fun. The only bummer is, and like obviously
we're going through the water regardless, but stagnant water, we're going to get sick. We're going to
get parasites, everybody. I'm I'm And it's just like what's just like three inches from the floor there.
Yeah. And like I just you know I'm I'm doing it. Yeah. Yeah. I I probably ultimately would walk
through pretty briskly. Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. We'd be running and I'd be like, "Oh, I just got some
mouth." But you know, just getting leg day going. We're doing it together. So we have we have support.
Yeah. Yeah. Get get behind me. Get in my wake. I'm [ __ ] I'm carrying us out of here.
Water ski in my wake. Incredible. All right, this next one is [ __ ] up. You thought that was bad? You are going
to leave after this. I don't want to go any further. You're like, I'm done. I'm dying in the
catacombs. I'm not I'm not passing. Go. I'm going to boil this water. I'm going to drink with this bat. I'm going to
slap this. I'm going to drunk with this bat. Yeah. All right. So, the next one is
I'm not drink. I'm not drink. Yeah. Okay. Last or not the last one, the next whatever the next one.
So, would you rather find your own full name etched into a skull like freshly etched into the skull full name or
discover a photo of you that has been taken of you a minute ago like laying down in a sealed chamber?
I like that you sat back for this. I mean, this is like a You said I got to get comfy. This is a
heady one. Immediately when you said etched into a skull, I was like, that's kind of
badass. It's kind of metal that for me that could be like even though it veers close to the compliment
in my own mind right away. Yeah. I like the idea that there would be somebody that's really into music that
would be down there and and think, you know, who would love this? Let me get out my chisel real quick.
Hold on a second. It's like that's something where I would go, "Oh, you thought of me. I I that's very kind
actually." That I That's the kind of compliment I'm looking for. Yeah. I I I would I would gauge the
sincerity sincerity of that. That was what Larry did to get employee of the month. Yeah.
Exactly. This is how you win my good graces, Larry. Gary would never think of that. He never
That's why I don't like Gary. Yeah. But my the photos would be that we've just discovered something that's not good and
is still here. That's in my mind. That's where that goes. Yeah. You know, and so I would think, oh, now
I got to watch my six all the time. I'm like not happy about that. Yeah. Just, you know, I don't love looking over my
own shoulder. That's not a good feeling. No. And I want to see like what's going
on. Like I don't want someone seeing me and I can't see them. Yeah. No, that's no bueno.
Yeah. I don't like people I don't like people creeping on me. I don't like I don't like [ __ ] crawling on me.
Same. Get off my back. Don't do that. You need to create some space here. Yeah, Gary.
Yeah. And I need to keep my eyes on you. It's true. Yeah. Get off my heels. You get in front
of me, Gary. I don't like Get where I can see you. I need to see you, Gary. Kodak Gary over here taking pictures of
me. Put them in the goddamn thing. Oh, I'm also a really ugly sleeper. So, oh, deviated septum. My mouth is wide open
when I sleep. It's not good. I'm the opposite. I'm like curled back, so I have like 18 chins. And my husband's
like, "Oh, she looks cute." And shows me later. I'm like, "Why the [ __ ] did you
take that picture?" For divorce in your sleep. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not finding an ugly
picture. It's a little bit. I think everyone is sort of ugly cute in their sleep. That's
the thing. You know what? Not everyone. I was gonna say I could keep it experience
because I think my husband my husband will take pictures of me if I fall asleep on the couch, but it's never
like, "Oh, look how cute you are." He's like, "Look how crazy you look." It's like a total dead body. I'm not
trying I'm trying to be nice here. But a total body. He's like, "Check yourself."
Yeah. He's like, "Damn, humbling you right now." She humble brags and he's like, "Look at this.
You're a 5-year-old. you know, you watch them sleep and you see their eyelids and
you just you trace the lines of their face and the cutest. And uh and then yeah, other then
unfortunately the rest of us look like a crime scene literally. Yeah. They look so peaceful and I'm like how
do you do that? I guess you don't have a deviant septum so they don't have worries yet.
Worried. There's still time. They're not cognizant of the world around us. They're like this is great.
We're going to break that nose somehow. We're going to can deviate. We'll make it happen.
The other thing is with the with your name etched into a bone. I was saying people have the same names. Maybe that's
not for me. Yeah. My last name means man in French. So it does. Josh man. Yeah. Yeah.
See, I have a pretty unique name. So it would freak me out a little bit. Yeah. To see Urkart on one I'd be like
I have the most modern name ever. Ashley Kelly. So yeah, you could say that could be a lot.
That could be anybody. Yeah. Anybody's mom made a bad decision. Name them Ashley.
That's some that's just uh you know Ashley Kelly. That's your your married name. So that's just a drunk Irish thing
that's drunking with that bat. Yeah. Oh no, that's my name. That's why I got rid of it.
Grab Ashley Kelly. Yeah. Oh, it's rough. Come closer. Yeah, we get an Irish bat, too.
Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I That's who got the French bat drunk. Hell yeah. Drunk.
There's a supplier down there. There's lore to be It's a fire. Of course there is. All right. Should we
do one more? Yeah. Would you rather light a final match, it's your last one left, and see a face
just inches from yours or see absolutely nothing but feel a cold hand grip yours and not let go?
I think cuz I'm such a horror movie afficionado that I'd want the visual. Yeah. One of the primary reasons I like
to watch horror and horror shorts, too, because horror shorts just get right into it.
Because I want the hairs on my arms stand up. And I think for the viewers at home,
sorry, Gary, where are you? But Gary, I think to share Sherry the Gary, you know, I I'd want the face.
Yeah, cuz I imagine the face would go Oh, yeah. And just blow the the thing out. You know, you light a match and
you're like, I've only got one left. And you just go and it goes and that would be
Oh, I love that. I think I think that would be more terrifying because now I'm in the dark
with this thing. Yeah. The gripping it to I think, you know, life is about accumulating wonderful
stories. That's what life is really about is, you know, logging just wonderful moments of time. And and I
think being gripped on the hand would be something that's just mine and I and makes it tougher to share. If Gary told
me that, I'd be like, "Uh, yeah, right. Yeah, right, Gary." Yeah. Someone's been in the mine too
much. Someone's drunking with the bats. Yeah. Yeah. So, I think, you know, life is about sharing. So, I think I'm taking
the face. What do you What do you think? I think I'm taking the face, too, actually, cuz I also don't like being
touched by people I don't know. So, if something gripped my hand, I'd be like, "Whoa."
Yeah. What are you doing? That would make me uncomfortable. I think, you know, you're about to get
gripped when something blows out your candle. But I can run at least. Yeah. Yeah. Right into it. Hello.
That's good. You could knock it down in that. Yeah. Let's throw some bows. Just body it. Yeah. Just body that thing into
a wall and out you go. We've watched horror movies. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know cuz
I don't like holding hands like they get clammy and stuff. But this one Okay. Well, that ruins my next thing.
Okay. Fine. I was going to be like, "Hold me. Reach out." It's virtual. It works. But
also, I don't like close talkers. Ooh. And when I think of somebody that close to my face,
plus that hot steamy breath in your face, that's not going to be fun. And like teeth with unknown origins. We're
back there again. I don't know this person. I don't know their teeth. Someone's got a little something they're
not want don't want to talk about. Little teeth baby over there on my right. This is
not naming any names, but I'm not saying who it is. Listen. Right on my screen. Listen,
this is a tough [ __ ] choice. I think I'm going hand. I'll go hand just to be different.
Oh, that's so reactionary. Just to be different. I'm He's like, I'm now I'm done. I am
leaving. No, but again, I don't like close talkers. Well, the thing is you're probably like
in these scenarios, I imagine like your imminent death is probably upon you in both of these scenarios.
Yeah. So, I'd rather have that like fun last moment of like, oo, real life scary
movie. Like, could be a ghost that thinks it's its birthday like blowing out the candle. You just go make
a wish. Yeah. Yeah. You don't know. Yeah. You don't You don't You don't You don't
know. You don't know. Nobody knows. Nobody knows. Nobody does. Oh, Josh, this has been so much fun.
Yeah, this has been a blast. Please come back. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'd love to come back.
Oh, we would love to have you. I had so much fun. This is killer. This has been so much fun. Is it Is
there anything that you want to plug before we let you go? We know we have you have some cool stuff going on like
your Charity Sweet Stuff Foundation. Oh, yeah. Anything? I was just about to say I'm
I'm not I don't I don't I'm not interested in plugging anything if people do it do whatever you want but
but yeah I have a charity called the Sweet Stuff. We help a lot of musicians families everyone in the music world is
self-employed people that are sick and have illnesses and we help a lot of kids of families of musicians.
That's awesome. And uh and it's very rewarding and um so yeah sweet stuff.org. Awesome. Sweet. We'll put it in our show
notes. Yeah, we'll link it. Oh, yeah. That that's that's something I would plug the rest. Enjoy yourself. You
know, I do stuff. If you if you want to find out, just go ahead. I love that. It's up to you. Do what you
want. Again, choose your own adventure. I like that. Choose your own adventure when it comes
to me and everything else. Hell yeah. Perfect. All right, guys. So, thank you so much for listening. We hope you keep
listening and we hope you keep it weird. Oh, wow. You went really long. That's great.
We always do. You gotta. You never know when it's going to end. Talk about weird.
We'll just put our coward at the end of this. All All three of our cowards. Yes. Perfect.
Weird. Coward. Coward. [Music] [Music] coward.

Join us for a chat with Queens of the Stone Age frontman Josh Homme! We talk paranormal experiences, his new project: Alive in the Catacombs and top it all off with a Paris Catacombs themed Would You Rather? Thanks so much to our new pal JHo for a solid hang🤘🏻

Looking to watch Alive in the Catacombs? Find it by visiting https://qotsa.com/

And don't forget to check out Josh's charity The Sweet Stuff Foundation: an organization that provides assistance to musicians and their families in times of need. Learn more or donate by visiting https://www.thesweetstufffoundation.org/

Stay in the know - wondery.fm/morbid-wondery.

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Brief Summary

Josh Homme discusses Queens of the Stone Age's performance in the Paris Catacombs and the emotional impact of the space.

Key points

The History of the Paris Catacombs. Exploring the origins and significance of the catacombs filled with human remains.
Existential Reflections in the Catacombs. Josh shares his overwhelming experience performing in the catacombs, connecting with the past.
Celebrating Life and Death. The Paris catacombs are a unique blend of life and death, showcasing beauty in mortality.
The Secret Cinema. A hidden movie theater was discovered in the Paris catacombs, complete with a bar and restaurant.
Embracing Imperfection. Perfection is an ideal to strive for, but not something to expect.
A Haunting Experience. In the depths of the catacombs, a nap leads to unexpected encounters.

Episode highlights

Episode quotes

It's a wild world down in the catacombs.

Commenting on the mysterious nature of the catacombs.

4:41WatchJul 17, 2025

Tension

50/ 100Some tension

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